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Disciplining Children with Love: A Biblical Approach

One of our most significant responsibilities as parents is lovingly guiding our children toward righteousness and disciplining them when necessary. However, it’s crucial to approach discipline from a place of love, not anger or frustration. The Bible provides a wealth of guidance on effectively disciplining our children while fostering a nurturing and loving environment.

Training Children

“Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old, he will not depart from it.” (Proverbs 22:6 ESV) This verse reminds us that disciplining our children is not merely about correcting their behavior in the moment but about instilling values and principles that will guide them throughout their lives.

Disciplining Children with Care

When disciplining our children, doing so calmly and patiently is essential. The Bible instructs us, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”(Ephesians 6:4 ESV) Disciplining out of anger or frustration can lead to resentment and a communication breakdown, which is counterproductive to teaching our children.

An Opportunity to Teach 

Instead, we should approach discipline as an opportunity to teach and guide our children with love and understanding. Hebrews emphasizes this point: “For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives.” (Hebrews 12:6 ESV) Just as God disciplines us out of love, we should discipline our children with the same intention.

Discipline and Consequences Versus Punishment

It’s also important to remember that discipline is not synonymous with punishment. Proper discipline involves setting clear boundaries, consistently enforcing consequences, and explaining the reasons behind those consequences. Proverbs reinforce this idea, “Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.”(Proverbs 13:24 ESV) While many people do not condone spanking, it’s important to remember that the rod in biblical times was used as a tool to direct sheep who were easily distracted not to hit children. Be aware that we do not condone physical abuse of any kind. You should never try to hurt or harm your child as a punishment. A light tap or pop on the bottom should be at your discretion. Be in control of yourself more than anything else.

Controlling your Children begins with Self-Control.

Whether a quick tap on the bottom or a stern talking to, ensure your discipline is age-appropriate and does not leave any marks on your child. Never discipline in anger or obsessive control. You are here to protect and guide them, not control them. It would help if you controlled yourself first, or you have lost the battle and possibly lost all respect, and you may lose your child’s trust.

Self-Discipline

Ultimately, the goal of discipline should be to help our children develop self-discipline, a crucial life skill that will serve them well as they grow and mature. As we discipline our children with love, we correct their behavior and teach them valuable lessons about responsibility, respect, and the importance of making wise choices.

You are Held Responsible

In summary, disciplining our children is a sacred responsibility that should be approached with love, patience, and a biblical foundation. By following the guidance found in Scripture, we can effectively guide our children towards righteousness while fostering a nurturing and loving environment. For more parental advice check out our blog.

Sources-

Dobson, J. (2016). The New Strong-Willed Child. Tyndale House Publishers.

Tripp, T. (2005). Shepherding a Child’s Heart. Shepherd Press.

Relational Wisdom in Action | The Forum of Christian Leaders online. https://foclonline.org/short-talk/relational-wisdom-action

How To Teach Your Toddler To Share. https://blog.brilindia.com/how-to-teach-your-toddler-to-share/

Chilton, M. (2014). Sport and society mix at a very violent intersection: the Charlotte Post, 40(2), 5A.

The Holy Bible, English Standard Version.2001.Crossway.(English Standard Version (ESV) – Version Information – BibleGateway.com)

BIBLICAL ROD MEANT TO GUIDE, NOT PUNISH – Sun Sentinel (sun-sentinel.com)

Bible Verses:

Proverbs 22:6 (ESV): “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old, he will not depart from it.”

Ephesians 6:4 (ESV): “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”

Hebrews 12:6 (ESV): “For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives.”

Proverbs 13:24 (ESV): “Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.”